I was 44 and, as Muhammad Ali lit the Olympic flame, I watched the television idly.
My left hand had been shaking occasionally; my arm did not swing when I walked; and I tripped with the left foot, throwing it forward rather than walking confidently on it. The piano was getting difficult to play; the more I practiced with my left hand, the worse it got. This mystified me as it was the height of summer. If it were winter it could be because of cold or frozen hands.
Suddenly I saw the great boxer heading in carrying the Olympic flame. I had always admired him and enjoyed watching him on the TV - "float like a butterfly, sting like a bee" - he was a joy to watch, but not this time. This time I saw the same shake in the arm that I had. Even now I can see the room where I was sitting. The sun had moved around the other side of the house and suddenly it seemed very cold. Then the commentator said, "Of course, he has Parkinson's disease". That’s all, just those few words. I had heard about Parkinson’s, but to me they were words as I knew nothing about it at all. But even with my lack of knowledge, I could see the change in the great man. A cold feeling settled in the pit of my stomach. I said nothing to anyone.
There are not enough words to describe the twists and turns my life has taken since Parkinson's entered it twelve years ago. It seems like I have lived with it for my whole life; at every waking moment it is with me.
I consciously chose to banish it, but confided in my younger sister about a month later and she told me I was foolish not to get it at least ruled out. So I went to my GP who said it wasn’t Parkinson’s. I was referred to a general consultant who said it could not be ruled out and from there to a neurologist who diagnosed Parkinson’s.
My neurologist said, when I described all the things that I liked to do, that I should be termed "a woman of accomplishment". That threw me; that I should hear such an old fashioned term be just the perfect description. Playing the piano, sewing, embroidery, painting, drawing, computers, graphic design, website design, a degree in English and an eclectic taste in reading material and gardening; the list just went on and on.
You know, that was when my life changed. When you have Parkinson’s you have it twenty four seven x 365. Every second of the day it is with you.
I was started on Sinemet (why, I do not know, and I spent nine miserable months trying to tolerate it); two Protium 40mg tablets a day, three for a few weeks, three Motilium with each Sinemet, then Antepsin and Gaviscon in between. I spent much of my time being able to walk properly with no tremor, but green-faced with nausea! In my family we do not get sick, we just suffer. During those nine months I don’t know what I would have done without the support of Liam, my life partner. We bought every book we could find about Parkinson’s and my brother, a consultant in Northern Ireland, sent me his medical dictionary.
A few months later there was a knock on the front door and I opened it to see a UPS delivery man with some large boxes - my brother in Cork had sent me his old PC. I opened it, put it together, started it up, clicked on Start, then Help and when it opened, started at A and worked my way through every help file on the computer. And so my fight against Parkinson's began.
